Deadbeat Parents Deserve to be Called Out

I see deadbeat people

Photo by Andrey Zvyagintsev on Unsplash

It seems like there’s an epidemic of deadbeat absent parents out there who need a proper kick up the arse.

Or maybe that’s just the Baader-Meinhof phenomenon — the frequency illusion cognitive bias where something you just noticed suddenly appears everywhere — highlighting the frequency of this mess to me now that I’m stuck in my own drama with a deadbeat parent.

For those of you who don’t know me, I have four kids with two dads, one who is the perfect co-parent, and the other who doesn’t see his kids at all. He says they don’t exist to him and is trying to get out of paying child maintenance support.

I can tell you now, the difference between the two dads is like chalk and cheese.

Having a 50% co-parent who arranges some of the clubs and activities for the kids and doesn’t pay child support as we split costs 50/50 is infinitely better than having to be the lone parent 100% of the time and having to fight for financial support.

When it’s just you by yourself, you’re more reliant on decent childcare options and flexible work and you never get a break.

Either way, far too many parents out there seem to think it’s okay to just ditch their kids after a breakup. It’s despicable. Completely childish. Totally irresponsible and heartbreaking for the kids.

If you’re a deadbeat parent, move on. I don’t want to know you.

However, if you’re dealing with a deadbeat parent in your life, the following ideas might cheer you up.

Deadbeat parents are everywhere

Just to be clear, a deadbeat parent is a parent who avoids their parental responsibilities: an absentee parent, or a parent who is not paying to support their child.

In 2022, in the UK, there were 2.9 million lone-parent families, 84% of which were headed by a lone mother. Mostly, the children in these families have some sort of contact with the other parent.

However, in 2013, the Centre for Social Justice gave a very conservative estimate that one million children in the UK had no meaningful contact with their fathers whatsoever.